Instead of taking pictures all night, I opted to use my precious time for drinking beer and smoking cigarettes simultaneously, without the constant pressure of moving and doing stuff that didn’t include beer and cigarettes. That was so much easier.

To be honest, I hadn’t been to the Cypress in years so I halfway expected to get stabbed in the parking lot or at least catch a bullet in the ass on my way out, so I was fucking stunned pleasantly surprised to see that the entire building got a ground up makeover and looks like an upscale lounge now. It was like seeing that old chick who sells newspapers by Target win the lottery and turn into Jessica Simpson.

I also got to meet Josh (Selarom) who is neither black, nor shaped like a square, so I’m more confused than ever by his profile pic.

Anyway, big ups to Drew who has been organizing kick-ass Christmas parties since Jesus was a baby. Good job capturing all three of my chins in that photo phucker. You will pay…

I also think they should serve pie and donuts in nightclubs, so clearly I’m an idiot.